Cleveland Indians pitcher Fausto Carmona Roberto Hernandez-Heredia was arrested in the Dominican Republic when he tried to obtain a travel visa under his false name. The Fausto-ian bargain helped the former Carmona get a four-year contract after his stellar rookie season in 2007, although that season is less impressive now that he appears to be three years older than his listed age of 28.

The Indians can’t be happy about the arrest or the age discrepancy, which might make them regret picking up his $7 million option for 2012. Who is happy about it? Former utility infielder Fausto Cruz, who is now, again, the only Fausto in baseball history. And also me, because I can start working on my screenplay about the incident. The working title is “The Fausto And The Furious.”

(Sean Keane)